we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
