he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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