ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
