i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
