I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize