i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
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