I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize