I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
