we're blogging at a bar
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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