That's intense
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I could fuck to npr.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
i think im in europe. pls send help
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
