Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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