They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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