My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
