Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
