Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
