i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
