She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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