If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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