i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
