How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
