To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
