It's just like the Real World with babies
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
