Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize