whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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