i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
