I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
