I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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