I must be too annoying 4 u.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize