so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
