Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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