His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
