Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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