You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
