Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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