She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize