We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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