3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize