Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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