sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
