no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
