I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
