dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
