the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
