Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Randomize
