Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
