Betty ford says i'm here all night
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
