Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
if only i could text you this smell
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
