u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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