i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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