there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Randomize
