his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I wish there were birth control emojis
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
