I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Randomize
